One year ago today I was in the hospital room waiting for a little bundle of joy to come into our lives. I knew it would only be a short time he would be with us and I wanted to make sure to soak up every precious moment.
Today, I'm in my own room recovering from another stay in the hospital. But this time I got to bring our bundle of joy home with us and I'm still trying to soak up every moment of her first couple of weeks here on earth. These moments are magical.
Tomorrow is Mikey's birthday. I miss him... a lot. It seems strange to miss someone that I only knew for such a short time. But I did know him and love him as much as any of my children. His spirit was familiar to me.
As I look back at a year ago I wonder how I was strong enough to let him go. I know I'm not that strong on my own. I've learned that we are given trials but we are also given help to get through those hard times if we trust in our Heavenly Father and let him guide us.
I remember him guiding us.
I remember feeling peace and comforted.
I remember knowing when the right time was to tell our children and having the strength to answer all their innocent questions.
I remember not wanting to sleep at night because I could feel the blessing of my baby's arms wrapped around me.
I remember coming home from the hospital after leaving my little boy knowing that there was happiness ahead.
I remember knowing that we had to continue to grow our family.
I wish Mikey could have stayed here with us. I wish I didn't have to lose a child. But I am thankful for the life he had and how he has changed me and our family.
Life is hard.
But if we trust in Him. . .
Life can be beautiful.
