Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Still Spinning

It's Tuesday, one of my favorite days.  I visit Mikey on Tuesdays.  When I drove up the pinwheel was spinning out of control.  Every other pinwheel around was quiet.  It was amazing, made me cry.  Maybe he really does make it spin.  I know he was happy we were there.


My heart still aches. It's so unfair that we couldn't keep you.
  

Like the pinwheel, my emotions keep spinning. I feel like a child, crying one minute and happy the next. When I start feeling lost I force myself to remember there is a plan for us. One of my favorite songs is from the movie Joseph King of Dreams.  The lyrics help me keep perspective.

"You know better than I. 
You know the way.  
I'll let go the need to know why because you know better than I."  

I don't need to know why this happened.  I just need to have faith that this will be right for us.  I don't want his short life to be for nothing.  So I have to try.  I have to try a little harder to be a little better.  My love for him will get me through.  Every baby is a miracle.

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